indian parents.why cant they just let their kids be happy?
Discussion Corner — By NikhilBhide on March 19, 2008 at 23:27girl asked:
im from india born & raised in uk.soon as i turnd 22 this yr & finished uni, my sis 10yrs older and married has brainwashed my mum in getting me married by the time i am 24.
this is making me so drepressed, since everytime we go to weddings they are scouting for guys.and in the future me &my mum will be moving to canada to live with my married brother who is 11yrs older than me.so in one of the weddings we went to this lady told us about some guy whos a doc and candian indian. im not interested. i dont wana meet him. he will be coming down for a wedding,
and im so in love with this white guy at uni. for the past three years. we both like each other, but we are soo shy to talk. the oppertunity is there for the taking but all i hear in my head is my family going mad. as it is forbidden. so i dont do anything about it.i have not courage. just so fearful.they have such a psychological hold on me. i stress and cant sleep at night. i feel so paralized by all this. im not happy at all.
my family does believe in love marriege, not arrange. but its only limited to indians. hoe can i limit myself. love isnt a specification . some one who can tick all the right boxes. i hae this. i can never tell my family how i feel about anything. we just arent open in that way., and when i try i know i have failed the battle beforre its begun. my mum is so stufbborn and stuck in her ways that she would never change. she is incapapble of even comprehending on little things that i say. all this had effected me. i have no confidence with men. i always feel shy. but the one guy i like i cant even be with. and i generally have always found non indian men attractive. so i feel like i may not ever like one anyway. they more they pressure me, the more they are pushing me away, and the more they make me feel like hating anything that is indian.
i just dont feel happy.
Tweet This
Digg This
Save to delicious
Stumble it
Loading ...
5 Comments
well im an 16 year old indian girl living in the US so i know what your going through. Well not about the marrying part since im too young for that. Well i think our parents think that an indian guy will make us happy. They think a white guy or any other type of guy would cause difficulty in our relationship. I understand that they are trying to look out for us, but sometimes you have to disobey your parents. obviously its easier said than done. And since you are a girl, its harder for you to be with that guy you love. Parents of course are more stricter on us than the guys. You are an adult, so you can do what you want to. You might hurt your family, but with time they will get over it. Its your life, you should be happy.
You need to do your own thing, who cares what they think i mean seriously, a parent should want their child to be happy and if they are doing anything but trying to make you happy then they are bad parents, your 22, at your age i had a job for 8 years and being living with my boyfriend for 4 years, get a job, move out and do your own thing, life is too short!
try to make your parents understand that you’re not happy and do explain to them .good luck
it’s not really a question
I feel for you, I really do.
Your parents are probably stuck in their old ways and it sounds like you sister is jealous coz you are young, single and going to uni whereas she’s probably at home with kids and a hubby she may might not love.
Your family is ****** then.
Every individual is different. I just don’t see you getting through to them.